


Doctor, you say there are no haloes

by aHostileRainbow



Series: Mostly BAMF: A Collection of Small Fries Kicking Ass (Literally or Figuratively) [27]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Supernatural, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe of an Alternate Universe, Apocalypse, BAMF Tony Stark, Crossover, Drama, Family Drama, Ficlet, Gen, Merchant of Death Tony Stark, Protective Older Brothers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:35:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23673958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aHostileRainbow/pseuds/aHostileRainbow
Summary: Or, Big Brother Tony Has Come To Burn Shit Down. Like a fallen angel was ever going to have his little brother.AU scene for Family Don't End With Blood series by MonPetitTresor.
Relationships: Tony Stark & Sam Winchester
Series: Mostly BAMF: A Collection of Small Fries Kicking Ass (Literally or Figuratively) [27]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/455026
Comments: 11
Kudos: 437





	Doctor, you say there are no haloes

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Apocalypse](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11229444) by [MonPetitTresor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonPetitTresor/pseuds/MonPetitTresor). 



Tony examined Sam over a long moment, taking in his terrible, broken stare. He glanced at his team, at the demons, at this fallen angel who had tortured his brother nearly to madness. Whatever was in his face when he turned made Cap lurch forward as if to reach for him, calling warningly, "Tony..."

It didn't matter. Dean had always made it clear that Sam wasn't his first choice or his first priority. He loved him, but not more than his father or his pride. He loved Sam, but not enough to listen or try to understand him. He trusted his brother, but not more than he trusted the angel he just met. The pattern had disgusted Tony for a long time - he wasn't going to perpetuate it. Tony had never had enough family to be willing to throw anybody in it away.

"J, send the Legion. Raze this place to the ground. Salt and Burn Protocol."

"Salt and Burn Protocol activated, Sir." 

"Thanks, J." Tony turned back to his audience, focusing on Lucifer for a moment before dismissing him wordlessly and stepping up to Sam.

"Time to go, pipsqueak." 

Sam turned to him slowly, as if he were moving through molasses, "Tony, what - I - I can't - "

"You can and you are, because I said so." Tony put on his best showman's smile, one hand going to Sam's back and guiding him forward, the other sweeping before them as if to wipe away the memory of a bad dream. 

"You're tired, little brother. You thought you had to fight this all alone, but you don't. I'm right here with you, I always have been, always will be, and for once you're going to let me take care of everything." Sam stumbled, stilled, shaking his head.

"Tony, you can't just fix this, I can't even - I won't give in, you shouldn't even be here, Lucifer - "

"You rang?" An oily voice spoke up, suddenly beside them, but Tony didn't falter as Sam flinched into him, just kept pressing him firmly toward the ramp of the jet. In his ear, JARVIS murmured, "Thirty seconds, Sir." 

Tony smiled, ignoring the Devil and the uncertain sounds coming from his teammates. Sam needed his full attention. Lucifer kept pace beside them for a moment in silence before appearing again directly in their path. Walking backwards, he and Tony locked stares for the first time. In the distance, Tony could hear a high pitched hum growing into the whine of straining metal. _Twenty-one, twenty, nineteen..._

"You are intriguing for a mortal, Mr Stark. And you're not even a Winchester! Congratulations!" 

Tony let his smile grow wider, but didn't respond at first. Instead, he called over his shoulder, "If any Avengers would like to get out of here under their own power, I'd suggest returning to the jet in the next ten seconds." The whine in the distance became a hiss and Tony watched steam rise from where water fell on the edge of the crowd of demons. Then the screaming started, truly unholy shrieks of agony that saw several Avengers ignoring his advice and racing forward. Oh well. They'd figure it out. 

One of the Iron Legion landed on his right then and Tony easily handed Sam off to be tossed over an armored shoulder and carried, bewildered and stunned, up the jet's ramp. Only then did he finally give Lucifer his full attention. 

The Devil was still looking intrigued but also pissy about being ignored and Tony's smile became wider, toothier than he would allow if anyone else were watching them. 

"Now, Lucy, I understand you've got a bit of a crush on my brother. I get it, he's sweet, but he's really not interested so I'm gonna politely suggest you back off."

Tony didn't acknowledge the demons dying in agony behind him, but Lucifer looked him up and down once, expression growing amused.

"That's not really an option here, Tony. Now where exactly did you get enough holy water to pull off this trick?"

Tony tapped absently at his earpiece, once, twice, "I was afraid you'd say that." With a shrug, he moved back a couple steps and watched another of the Legion zip down to drop a circle of glistening metal from fifty feet up. The circle rapidly expanded, landing in perfect form around the Devil himself. With a click, the holy oil covering his little surprise ignited and Lucifer went from amused to pissed with speed only the truly insane could manage.

Tony popped on his favorite sunglasses to protect his eyes from the holy fire and refused to let his smile twitch. 

"Oh, Lucy, you really should have done your homework on more than the Winchesters. Did you think they were the only mortals who could be a threat to you and your brother's little game?" Tony clicked his tongue in mocking disappointment, stepping close enough that they could see each other clearly through the flames. 

"You want to know how all this is possible? You want to know how I can promise you won't spend a single minute more tormenting my family? It's cause I'm Tony fucking Stark." Lucifer roared his fury in Tony's face.

"Pathetic _human_!" And Tony laughed. 

"Silly Lucy. Didn't you get the memo? In the end, humans always win. God totally plays favorites, and you would know. And anyway, who said being human means you can't be something more?"

Tony stepped closer still, watching the shadow of wings flex behind the Devil. 

"I was born human and I'll die human but I'm not doing all this as just another human member of Team Free Will. The media had a name for me once upon a time, you know - they called me the Merchant of Death." Lucifer finally went quiet. 

"Yeah, Lucy, you tell me - when's the last time anyone took _Death's_ name in vain?"

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "Monet Refuses the Operation" by Lisel Mueller.


End file.
